Harder to breathe

Is there anyone out there;
cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe

ok so. I went for the "All In! Young writer's seminar" today.
I thought the first part was quite interesting.
But after lunch then it was all downhill from there.

So yea. needed to wake up at like 7 plus.
and i'm only home like. now?

sigh.
Just had another paranoia attack.
Yea it's attack because it's kind of like a heart attack.
Like you know you have that condition,
but you don't know when it will act up
and utterly kill your emotions.
for the rest of the day.

"Everything goes better with a partner today. Make sure that you're buddied up, no matter how you're doing -- even taking out the trash works out better if two of you are doing it together. "
-horoscope for libra

Yea. thanks for that advice. No one even wanted to come near me. stupid horoscopes.
So much for thinking today was going to be a nice day.

Remember how one was my speculation was that someone in class hates me alot?
ok change that.
now it's two somebodies.

sigh.
Not that i'll blame them too.

I wasn't like this.
not this... mess.
ahh wells.

And i still keep having these... dreams.
of running, running away.
i couldn't remember what was last night's one. though.
and good riddance too.

Ahhh. so what.
just hate me, i don't care anymore.

I suck.

Underdog

One long walk down, through the hallway now;
you're finding out you don't fit in this time around.

ok. it's 11.57pm now.
and i want to sleep before 12.
and i realized i didn't blog for the past few days.
So here it is.

i'm tired. booo.
maybe cause i never sleep enough.
AND.
i keep having these dreams.

i mean like every day.
seriously every day.
two days ago, i dreamt i was some sort of detective.
and there was a killer with a gun after me.
and i was so so so scared.
i was hiding and running, hiding and running.

Then yesterday night, i dreamt about disobeying some rule in AJ.
and somehow me and 3 other people(can't remember who) ran out of AJ with 5 million bucks in a briefcase.

And apparentally they're some sort of dirty money.
or we stole them from AJ. Something like that.
So we had to get the briefcase back to a house.
then I was in charge of carrying the case.
So there were stuff that happened along the way.
like one of them distracted a policemen,
the other had to divert some ah beng's attention away from the briefcase.
so left like me alone
and i was hiding and running, hiding and running again.
and being scared, so scared for my life.
I think it's a bad sign.
Like dream interpretation kind of thing.
Should go and google. ok maybe after this.

It's 12.01 now.
I should sleep.
bye!

The Show

I'm just a little caught in the moment,
I'm so scared, but I don't show it.

booya!

early post today.
cause i came back... early!

so the stupid day is over, good riddance. bleh. ahha.

ok so apparently one of my ang pows had like 200 bucks.
<3 my relatives. HAHA.
hmmm ok this is not going to be a very long post.
because i don't know what to post about, actually.

ohoh! i just downloaded a new batch of games for my phone.
AND OMG. two of them are damn fun. got me hooked for the whole day.
actually made visitation kind of fun. =D

And tomorrow's going to be a fun day!
cause i'mma going to be able to catch up on some homework at last.

So i'm.. at home now.
AND DAMN BORED.
i got nothing to do =(
so just stoning at the com.

and everyone's out bai-nianing.
no fair!
someone talk to me?
ph-easeeeeeeeeeeeee?
hahaa. don't even think anyone will see this.
ahh weeeeelllls.

Season: Autumn

Live Like We're Dying

And if your plane fell out of the skies,
who would you call with your last goodbye?

Alrighto!
So I'm back. First about my day.
Hmmm. woke up at 9 exactly.( no alarm clock! =D)
then played a little guitar.
Then after that that went out with family to visit aunt.
Who then followed us back home for lunch.

Which was vegetarian.
ahha cause my aunt's a devout buddhist.
So it's kinda have to eat vege when she comes over.
=x

and after that we went to pray
and at si ma lu.
it was super duper crowded! ahh!
haha like this!

So after that we went home.
and by that time it was 12.
AND THEN I WAS OMG BORED.
like just keep taking cny goodies (that my family bought. ALOT.)
and rot in front of the tv.
watched starship troopers 2
and then a little bit of some chinese mahjong show.
Then tried to do vectors.
But like almost every question dunno =(
So did like one page of vectors.
And here I am! tadah!

hahaa anyway! at si ma lu there was this super big chinese horoscope in the middle of the square.

It said sheeps would enjoy "enormous success in academic, wealth and love life" AHA.
but we had to take care of our health due to alot of activites going on.
And also to keep high-risk investment to a minimum.
ah wells. haha.

ok anyway.
So. today is valentine's day and cny.
too bad for the couples out there.
ahha. family or lover. muahhaa.
I can already see the potential quarrels coming up.
ahhhh. wells. lucky i'm not involved =D


Even though it would be nice to walk under the starry night at the coast of east-cost park in the middle of the night, with a close friend and just talking about nothing in particular, but just absorbing in the atmosphere. then after that sit on the breakwater and admire the night sky while hearing the ocean waves crash on the shore and fall asleep there.

sigh.
I shall try to cheer myself up.
I guess.
stupid valentines.

anyway! will be super duper bored tomorrow.
SOMEONE SOMEONE PLEASE ASK ME OUT OR ENTERTAIN ME TOMORROW. OMG.
HAHA.
smell ya later!