sigh.

i dun know whether i should be posting this. I wonder if anyone reads at all.

so i'm now in my room alone, listening to Our lives and thinking about school.
Once i tink abt school, i can't help but think of about 2 persons. they are the 2 people that have gained my hate. not just dislike but the feeling of pure hate. The feeling that you can't just throw away. this lingering feeling that just keeps sticking to your heart.

Always trying to hit me really hard on the back and taking down everything on the phone is a sadistic way to enjoy yourself. I like school and have promised to work really hard this year to make it my most hardworking and happiest last year in school. but you 2 have successfully made my school life hell. i now dread going to school everyday and to see you 2. you 2 make me sick.

Whenever i lie in bed and try to sleep, i'll get these thoughts.
Once, it was if i had a gun with me and you 2 at point blank. and then i'll just fire it.
Once, I thought to sticking a pin at my back so that you'll hit the sharp part of the pin whenever you try to hit my back.
Once, I wanted to explode and just throw you 2 down the corridor and to just kill you 2 right there and then.

I dunno why i'm even feeling this at all. I've never felt this way before. the furthest i've gone is strong dislike.
I guess you 2 have just evoked the hate part of me.
I've never tried of offend anyone intentionally, and neither have i tried to hurt anyone physically .
I don;t know what caused you 2 to like to attack me so much.
I don't know what's wrong with me that you 2 hate so much.

I dunno what i'm feeling right now, the feeling of hate is getting stronger in my heart everyday.
I really want to cry it all out. but i can't.

I just want to KILL.

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bored and tired.

So i'm here blogging again. I'm tired =X

Went to the library to revise chem and lit today,
didn't do a lot of work though. was just slacking and slacking. =X

went home at around 7pm

oh ya, and it's my 3rd day not eating either lunch or dinner.
though i had a little bit of snacks here and there
I'm starving, but no choice, going on a super-diet. =X
So i'm here sitting in my room, surfing the net, listening to shut up by simple plan and skater boy.
=.='' Sec 4 life is super hectic, i hope i can catch up with the train before it's too late.

I've got hopes and dreams in my life that are so ridiculous, i wish they weren't there at all.
So i'm now a mindless person who is just studying and studying with ridiculous hopes and dreams
I'm feeling super pathetic now.

What is the meaning of my life? What am I suppose to do?

It's like if i go poly and pursue my interest, it would mean no future for me
If i go jc and study arts stream, then go on to university, den get a major or degree in english or lit, but then wad?what do i do?

My mind is tired and sick. I just want to end it all.

-Having no hopes and dreams is like having having a mirror that is shattered into pieces so tiny, there's no chance it'll ever turn back into a mirror-

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School's boring. =.='

ah well, looks like my 2nd week into school. I'm tired and almost sick of school life.
Homework are already piling up, and stress is starting to get into me.
and damain just had to spread rumors at this point of time .=.='
yea. that's about it.

oh, and one more thing, wadever damain is saying is not true. =)

The sentence i made on top is true to a certain extent =p

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