Faith is guilty!

Tonight.
is.
a.
very.
dark.night.

And I just ate.
But my stomach feels weird.
Like a semi-state between hungry, and not so.

YOG was... sigh.
Ok i expected it to be...more magnificent.

I mean the Olympic flame had protesters trying to disrupt the flame
all along the way, igniting world-wide controversy.
And...what do we have?
A Primary school kid who ran 15km.
like.. ok......
I bet the people in... Mozambique run like 20 everyday.
or something.

While I was eating dinner and watching,
hearing the commentator go on about hope,
and world peace and whatsnot.
I switched to CNA.
This is in order what i saw:

"New Landslides in China-- Killed hundreds"
"Wall street down in 4 quarters consecutively"
you get the idea.

Oh wells.
Let's hope the athletes from China don't have relatives in that landslide.

Bring up Fate for questioning

'sup.

My NDU was...sigh.
I didn't even give a definite answer during the interview.
So my fate is still....totally in the hands of them now.

I'm just going to take whatever comes.
Since it comes and it goes,
and this is not going to have a long-term effect on me.
Or at least no negative ones I can think of right now.
Unless I die or lose a limb or two,
but i hope not. bleh.

Resting tonight.
Or should i say, resting for like.. one hour.
then i'm off to bed.
for two more timed pracs tmr.
and this week is suppose to be..
my more slack week.

Life.is.
not exactly in the best of terms with me right now.

Who knows?
Maybe it really IS for some greater good in the future.
who knows?

Just take what comes,
one step at a time,
and you'll see the big picture,
soon enough.

soon enough.

In the Deep Dark Blue of Confusion

I.Am.Utterly. sigh.

Tomorrow.
is the NDU vocational assessment.
It's from 7.30am till 5.45pm.
talk about the horrible length of the thing?

and it's not as though I studied alot today.
Means all my tests can..prepare to fail already. LOL.

AND I'm still undecided.
I mean, I don't really mind.
But my parents are against it.
But the risk is also there...
sigh.

why can't SAF just force us to do it.
then at least we don't have to worry about whether we want it or not.

Today is not a good day.
It was full of sinful pleasure.
Not good.
I'm going to academic hell.
sigh.

The dark sky smiles

Unproductive.
unproductive.
unproductive.

Playing is like...drugs
Work is like... staying off it

At first staying off drugs is impossible,
so many people don't even bother.

Then some realize that in order for them to succeed,
they have to rehabilitate off drugs.
So some try their best to do it.
of course most people don't succeed.

In fact most people who try to go cold turkey,
often revert back after a few weeks,
deeper than ever in the drug-induced illusion.

Some, a rare few, succeed.
They took control of their lives.
They stopped the drug
that spreads throughout their body.

They see what is important,
and they don't do it.
So they get out of the drug-hallucinated life,
and they do what they know will make them happy.

So most of them go out,
and they study.
they are miserable, but they keep telling themselves,
"It's going to be worth it."
and they just do it.
It kills them inside.

Then they go on to their working life,
the world of office politics,
and they work harder than ever,
the long hours pains them,
but they just want that promotion,
so they tell themselves,
"it's going to be worth it."

And then,
old and rich.
They sit back, no family, no wife.
They look at their massive wealth,
with no one to share it with.

They are too old to drink,
too old to go out and play,
too old to laugh and joke with friends.

"Is it worth it?"

Is it better to stay in the play-induced hallucination where you will be happy,
then to face the real world and search for that true happiness that will never
come?

Just something that crossed my mind.