The Dark Calming Ambience

-I think about you day and night, it's only right-

Andddd. Today was wasted.
Broken plans, Interrupted outings, sudden alerts.
ahhh wells. guess that's how life is suppose to be.
Unpredictable.

Went out for dinner with mum and dad.
Went over to chomp chomp area to eat chicken rice.
managed to persuade them to go over to coffee bean =p
had a super nice cup of mocha ice blended.
hah. and the ambiance there is really really nice.
esp inside the shop.
esp at night.

There's no way i can sleep now.
hah. and i'm bored.
Looks like I'll just rot more at online tonight.

Mood: High on caffeine, Low at night
Weather: Peaceful night

Random View: Being peacefully sad is actually better then being high and chaotically happy.


-Imagine how the world could be, so very fine-

Confusion Monhusion Kondusion

-I can't stand to fly, I'm not that naive-

Lots of stuff to blog today.
Dunno where to start.
Had another sleeping marathon ytd night.
slept from 9pm to 7am.
Not bad eh.
Have to catch up on my sleeping what.

Then went to school.
haha went for hip-hop.
Felt a bit stupid at first. looking at yourself in the mirror.
But i guess it got pretty fun later.

Then went off with clinton and al and yuesheng and jermyn to al's house to play cards cause shaun wanted to finish his resilience workshop and we could not go his house and play xbox ><

then went to cat high.
saw jit huih and elaine goh.
I waved at valerie but she dao me!
hmph.
haha then hung around with junfeng and mrs chew later.
and john ang.
he went to school of american or something!
the teachers there drink booze in front of the students while teaching maths.
hahahaha.

Then popped off to orchard with junfeng to meet daryl and drew at around 6.
haha then later we went to mos to eat.
and then off to Big O's to have some chocolate brownie cake thingy.
super nice! =D
and i miss them so so so so much.

and you know.
maybe we haven't change as much as i thought.
not at all.
Exchanging stories about jcs, gossiping about school people,
sitting at the nice seat in Big O's, just hanging out and relaxing.
It's like a trip back to the nice past.
The past that i miss so much.
And i had deja vu there. hah.
I feel like all tearing when i those nice moments.
gahhh. I feel like a sissy. this sucks.big time.

And the little boy hides at the corner of the room.
cowering, crying.Tearing up at the attention others is getting.
And he decides to make a change.
He suddenly finds himself at the middle of the room.
Grooving out, joking.
He enjoys every moment.
Not caring that out of the corner of his eye.
He sees he's still at the corner of the room.
He doesn't care if it's an illusion.
The illusion absorbs him.
And he jumps in it.
Not caring.
Past bothering.

-I'm just down to find, the better part of me-

"In order to get something positive,
You'll always have to exchange it,
with something negative."
-Yeo WenBin

The Confused Identity

-You looking for something you can't find, if you give it up you'll lose your mind-

Didn't come online yesterday due to a sudden sleeping obsession. Slept from 6 to 10.30, ate dinner and went back to sleep.
But still, i fell asleep during econs lecture!
ahhhh.
And publications seems more and more fun.
hmmmmmm.
Looking forward to the publicity campaign.
And having the cca dominated by gong jiao people is really interesting.
Gonna see how this turns out...

And the boy looks at his dad.
"But daddy, why must we open doors for girls?"
The dad looked at him. and in the softest and most gentle voice the boy has ever heard, it told him,
"Because we are suppose to be gentlemens, son."
"But daddy, what is a gentlemen suppose to do?"
"He is suppose to be gracious and giving to females."
"But why? why can't they do the same?"
And to that, the dad had no answer.
Neither did the boy.

Mood: Full-Confused
Weather: Hot Night
Random View: E-learning beats learning, anytime, anywhere.

-But what can you say? You're gonna have a good day

"There'll always be a rainbow after the storm,
But a storm before every rainbow."

The Fly Trap Of Venus

-Hey girl i wanna catch your wave-

Today was okk.
Suffered a relapse during Chinese lesson.
Dunno whether it's the coffee or my phobia relapsing.
but ahh wells.

I feel.. weird.
yea. that's it. weird.
It's like... illusional.
This illusional mist swirling around me.
Making me rejoice and sadden.
And knowing all this is not true.
But yet believing in them.

The fly knows it's fate when it sees the venus fly trap.
It tries to escape. But the sweet smell is too strong.
It knows it would be the last thing he would ever taste.
But the temptation overwhelms him.
Everytime it thought it had escaped the temptation,
the sweet smell just comes back to haunt it.
The fly trap enlashes it's alluring tentacles of temptation.
And wraps the fly into it's heart.
the fly gives up.
and dives straight towards the smell.
Oblivious to the scent of it's dead kind.
Oblivious to the smell of death.
Oblivious.

Current Mood: Illusional
Current weather: Troubled-Night
Random View:
It's better to die rich and lonely. Then poor and loved.


-Hey girl i wanna drift away with you-

The shadow that lived under the sunlight

-I'm 22 for a moment-

Bah. Went library the whole day today. tired. as usual.
Spent the morning fretting over maths. gave up at 1 plus.
picked up the kite runner when i saw it at the fiction section.
decided to read it since i saw it on the top place of the bestsellers' list on the sunday times this morning.
Breath-taking. By the time i took my eyes off the last word of the book, it was already 6pm plus.
Must have been one of the most emotionally-enriching novels i've read so far.
And the Assaf guy in the novel is gross. He's freaking gay at the age of 11? yucks.
But still. using brass knuckles to beat people up at that age is wayyy sick.
I almost cried la at the part when hassan was bullied.
gah.

Yea. and andrew just sms-ed me asking to go out for dinner on friday night! yay!
haha been such a long long time since i met him and daryl and junfeng.
I bet all of them have changed. Probably for the better. I hope.
I've changed too. and yet I need someone to tell me whether it was for the better.
for my brain's giving me mixed signals.
I'll just have to wait for the answer.
I'll just have to wait till friday night.
friday night.

And suddenly, everything around me's all silent again.
It's just me, Five for fighting, against the still world.
The non-moving world.
Stopped in time.
While i try not to get pushed forward.
Don't push me. please.
I've had enough of the action.
I just want to still and get lost in time.
Lost in the melodious tune of the past.
And stay left behind in the past.
for ever.
and ever.

Current Mood: Peaceful-Sad
Current weather: Rainy

-And she feels better than ever-